It's Me Sarah!

****look up skype on google and download it. It's so that you can IM or video chat with Sarah while she is home. Once you have skype downloaded add sary1inamillion

***Another note: I have heard from many that they are unable to leave comments. I have now set this blog to accept comments from any visitor:) Just click the comment link left of the little yellow pencil below any update and leave a comment!!!:) you can leave an anonymous comment and then just leave your name in the comment.

Hey everyone, this is Sarah writing! I am home now and feel great to be out of that hospital. Don't get me wrong I am so grateful for everything that all my doctors, Dr. peterson, Dr. Ash and Dr. ford have done for me and also the wonderful Nurses at L.D.S. hospital. They saved my life! But it was so hard going through everything that I can't even explain it. I see this disease as a blessing in my life also because it has brought so much good and positive things in to not only my life but others as well. I just want to thank all of you for being so loving and supportive! I have had so much love to get me through this hard journey. I just posted some new pictures of my home coming and my new wigs, I hope you will enjoy! I am doing a lot better and hope I wont have any set backs to where I have to go back to the hospital. I still have to where my mask for at least another 3 months and be very very careful not to get sick but I cant explain how happy I am to be home! I can deal with all of that just to be home! My twin sis is doing good, she left to oregon with my father last night to go see my grandfather. My grandfather isn't doing so well so they are going to see him.  I wont be all the way better for about another year, but hope to See a lot of you soon! Thank you all again! Love and Light Always! 

~*SaRaH*~

HOME!!!

Sarah is coming home yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

NAPS & ENGRAFTMENT

I am still at the hospital with Sarah. she is taking a nap right now. The drugs that they have her on make her sigh and talk in her sleep... it is the cutest thing, right now she is saying "you wanna watch this?" "sigh" "what is that?" "sigh" "chelsea?" "sigh"... she says everything in question form, once she said my name it made me so happy! She's dreaming about me:o) I have always told everyone that I have never had a dream without Sarah in it, we are as one in my dreams, she is always by my side... for her to say my name while she is sleeping just confirmed that I am with her as well.

She started to feel a lot better after this morning past, doctor Peterson and the nurse practitioner Amity came in and told us that her neutrophils are at a 6... just yesterday they were at a 2... Neutrophils: are the most abundant type of white blood cells in humans and form an integral part of the immune system. The docs are so impressed with Sarah, she is improving so quickly. The doctors also said that if she stays above a 5,that means she has reached engraftment. and if her rash mellows out, she starts to eat, and her temp does not rise then she should be able to go home in 4-5 days... now this isn't certain, nothing ever is so don't get too excited... but we are keeping our fingers crossed!!! 

SARYBEARY

I am at the hospital right now with Sarah!!! It had been 13 days too long, I am so happy to see her... I can't touch her because I was sick 4 days ago so we wouldn't want to risk her getting an infection, I really want to hug her :0(   She's not doing so well because the steroids are making her really irritated and depressed, there has been a lot of crying today, it's really hard to explain how rough it is for her. Even though I have been speaking to her through the web cam on Skype, I didn't understand how horrible it is for her each day!!! Both Sarah and my mom agree that "there are no good days in this room only better days than some" She is so strong SO VERY STRONG! Her body is also working overtime to build everything back up causing her to become very tired. It's amazing to think about it, no wonder they call it her second birthday... She really is being reborn, growing and reforming a part of her body that for some unknown reason quit working! Just looking at her gives me a whole new respect for life and how powerful the body, mind and sarah's BEAUTIFUL SOUL can be.

*Once again I want to thank all of you, your support has been amazing!!!;)

My sweet

So I couldn't go see Sarah on Sunday because I'm sick... I am so mad!!! I really want to see my sweet, but I would never want to be the one to cause something serious. If she were to get what I have it would be deadly, so I have to wait till next week to see her. She isn't doing so well, she keeps getting really high temps and the rash on her whole body is still there, I just want her pain to go away:( I love her so much, more than I could have ever imagined! A few months ago we would bicker all the time... now I can't even imagine anything other than hugging the stuffing out of her and rubbing that bald head of hers ha ha ha;)

Dido Videos | Movie Clips

great news

Great great news!!! yesterday we found out that Sarah is producing blood cells... and only after a week! That is amazing, they told her it would be 21 days! I don't have all the details yet but I thought I should just do a quick update for everyone:) right now she isn't doing so great, she had a fever last night and it has lasted till tonight it is now 102 but last night it was 105.5 the nurses have never seen a temp that high on that floor of the hospital and some of the nurses have been there for 12 years. She still has a bright red rash all over her body including her face and now semi bald head... I didn't realize how bad it would effect me... when I saw her with just a few more pieces of hair left I couldn't help it, I just started to sob and so did my lil brother Skyler, but everything is getting better, her temp is going down, dad brought her wig and lil cute hats, and I think that tonight they might actually get some sleep. they have probably had 30 min of sleep in 2 days ha ha. I have been talking to her through skype video, I haven't seen her in person for 8 days now!!! and Skyler hasn't seen her for 2 weeks!!! We miss her so bad, We are going to see sarah and mom on sunday! yay!!!!!!!! 

Food... YUCK

my back 3 days after surgery, a lot more bruising
my back 2nd day after surgery, 7 holes into the skin 3o0 in the hip bones

ok ha ha ummmm I decided to put the hip surgery pics back on, some people wanna see and some don't sorry for those that it grosses out ha ha ha

Hey everyone, I over did it yesterday causing myself to feel very sick!!! I feel a lot better now but I should have taken it easy after going through a big surgery like that... I should have listened to my grandmother:) She took such good care of me yesterday!!! I am still very sore and my lower back is one big purple bruise! We had to stay home today because My dad and lil bro are sick and I thought I was coming down with a lil something but I think it was just from not resting enough after my surgery. I really wanted to celebrate mothers day:( I feel so bad for my mommy, but we are going to celebrate it once were able to go back to the hospital... so maybe on wednesday. or thursday. Today is Sarah's last day of steroids, the reason she had to take steroids was so that they could keep infection away. She just got a transfusion of platelets, they are going to give her calories through her IV because she hasn't been eating... she lost 12 pounds in one day. She tried to eat mac and cheese today but couldn't because the chemo is effecting her taste buds causing all of her food to taste "really gross" other than that I guess it's just a waiting game again to see how her body takes my bone marrow.

*love you all*

DAY AFTER BONE MARROW TRANSPLANT

MY SWEETY

Hey everyone, I got home around 8 last night... I was really sore. I didn't think that I would be this sore but Ill probably be better in another day or 2. My grandma is really sweet and came down here to take care of me:) When I woke up from anesthesia I was really groggy, I had to have oxygen because my oxygen level kept going down, I started to cry, and told the doctors that I was on a cell phone call with my sister ha ha I was mad when they woke me up! The dream was so comfortable and me and Sarah were back to normal:) after that, I cried some more... I guess the anesthesia makes me really emotional ha ha. During my surgery Sarah's lower back started to hurt and she had a hard time breathing, my mom didn't think about it at the time but when she saw me it hit her that we might have been having a little twin time while I was under anesthesia ha ha ha... me talking to sarah on the cell, Sarah's lower back hurting, problems breathing... I donoooo;)... could be possible... we did have the same dreams when we were little;) 

Sarah is doing a lot better today, she was actually sleeping this morning!!! Last night she was in pain because there was so much liquid in her stomach. We kept telling them to give her lasix... that is what makes her urinate so that she is not in so much pain from all of the fluids they have been filling her up with. Also once my surgery was done they bagged my bone marrow and sent is up to sarah, they said that they got some great marrow and that it was very successful!!!;) They finished infusing the marrow around 7pm So now we are just trying to get through these next few weeks, they are finished giving her chemo but some of the effects will start in 7-14 days... such as mouth sores, loosing her hair, and getting ill.  When she was sick these last few days it was most likely the ATG aka the horse antibodies that were killing off her white blood cells. She will still have to be isolated in the hospital for about another 4-6 weeks from any human contact other than the nurses and immediate family because the chemo and ATG has killed off her immune system so that she can have a fresh start in accepting my bone marrow.

SURGERY DAY

Sarah's back to not feelin too well, her stomach hurts really bad, she is in pain all over, and she didn't get much sleep:(... but today is the surgery so everything will be great soon!!! it is now 5:06am, just 24 min. till my surgery:)

Sarah's back to not feelin too well, her stomach hurts really bad, she is in pain all over, and she didn't get much sleep:(... but today is the surgery so everything will be great soon!!! it is now 5:06am, just 24 min. till my surgery:)

BEAUTIFUL SARAH AND MOMMY!!!

ME AND MY SWEET BEAUTIFUL CLONE!!!

Its amazing she felt good enough to get up and take a shower, put her hoody on and put some makeup on... and this was only after 13 hours of her being a 10 in pain!!! She is so strong and beautiful! This is our pic we just took together!

WOOT WOOT

lol pic from a few weeks ago-->

YAY!

Sarah is feeling a lot better now it’s 6:10pm!!! She’s actually consious of everything that is going on now, SHE’S ALIVE SHE’S ALIVE ha ha ha!!! Oh and she’s actually eating something... She hasn’t had anything to eat for 2 days! One sad thing is that my dad is sick... probably from all of the stress, but now he can’t even come to see her until he gets better:( he is soooo sad! I will be home for the weekend after my surgery to recuperate then I will be back at the hospital to see Sarah again:)

PAIN 10

before pic... she was really swollen and in a lot of pain:(

Sarah's temp started to go down this morning at 12:00 so I decided I better go get some rest at a house next to the hospital that one of my dads friends is letting us stay in... I would try to sleep at the hospital but only one person can and that is my mommy:) When I woke up this morning I called my mom to get an update, she told me that it was the worst night yet, her temp went back up to 105, she broke out in a rash, and got rigers again but worse than last time. It is 2:50pm right now and she just broke out in another rash. They always ask her what she would rate her pain at on a scale from 1 to 10... when she got her first dose of chemo, she wasn't really in any pain yet. As the days went by she rated her pain at about a 6 then 2 nights ago a 8, then last night a 10!!! She is being so strong though. TOMORROW MY SURGERY YAY!!! we will start the marrow transplant tomorrow!

15 minutes to midnight

Sarah's temp just went up to 105.1 they are trying to bring it down, they still have not given her last dose of chemo because of all of the other drugs they are putting into her.

Tuesdays update

Last night was pretty scary, sarah had what they call RIGERS... that is when your whole body has a reaction to the immunosuppressive drug, she was very cold, shaking uncontrollably, muscles tensing causing a lot of pain. 

The immunosuppressive drug Prevents the rejection of transplanted organs and tissues. It kills her immune system so that her body can accept my bone marrow. The immunosuppressive drug is called ATG which is an antibody from a horse. 

ATG:They take a humans white blood cells, inject them into a horse, the horse generates antibodies to kill off the white blood cells, they take the horses blood, filter out the antibodies, put them in a bottle and name it ATG ha ha ha and then they inject it into sarah, killing off her white blood cells... no wonder it looked like she was on her death bed... because they are killing off apart of her in order for her body to accept something new!!! This is all so crazy. She also gained 15 pounds in 3 days, then she lost 6 pounds today. Quote from sarah: "I feel like I'm doing something wrong"... We keep trying to tell her that she is being very strong and that she can't control the reactions her body is having from the chemo and immunosuppressive drugs.

Sarah is on her last dose of the ATG and will get her last dose of chemo probably within the hour. Then tomorrow is her rest day!!! yay, maybe her and mom can get some rest now... some people think that when you go to the hospital your able to get some rest... this is the last place you can rest ha ha. 

Another thing that happened today: Some of my dads friends Ray Gunn and his wife came to the hospital and gave Sarah and I a blessing:):):) it was so beautiful and they are the sweetest people. Anyways just thought I would give a quick update.

*Love you all*

sorry it's been so long since the last update

I am sooooo sorry it has been so long since I have updated the blog!!! As you could imagine it has been quite hectic and I never thought I could be so exhausted. I had been running around trying to get everything handled before Sarah went in for chemo... it came so slow and fast at the same time, it was a waiting game at first and Sarah and I are very impatient... I guess that’s one of the lessons all of this is teaching us! Any who we have all been keeping high spirits with the occasional cry. We brought her in yesterday, she started her first dose of chemo, and pumping her with tons of different drugs that cause different side effects... I could have never imagined what this would feel like... it's like a whole new emotion that does not have a name yet. I am sitting next to her right now with my mom, dad, and little brother, I keep getting distracted with all the nurses coming in every 15 minutes so sorry if this update doesn’t make sense in certain places... Sarah just had a panic attack and started to cry, her body was reacting to the drugs they have her on... I can’t stand when she cry’s... I couldn’t stop crying until she did. She has been sleeping a lot, I am just thankful that she is not in a lot of pain and hopefully she wont be these next few days. They are about to set her up with her next dose of chemo... I will try to update again as to anything new that happens.

p.s. We would like to thank our family, friends and coworkers for everything they have done!!! It really does mean a lot! On tuesday and saturday I went to auction with my dad and helped him out a little bit at the car lot, it has been so wonderful seeing everyone and everyone has been so supportive and loving!!! It is amazing how full your heart can feel!!!’ thank you all sooooooo much from the bottom of all of our hearts!